MOMMA! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! HERE IT GOES!!!!

Sooooooo writing emails is like running a race. Right before I log onto the computer, I'm freaking out. Absolutely freaking out. I guess that only people who would know exactly what I'm talking about are the people that have run races with me before. Mostly, I get to the computer, I think about what I'm about to do, and then I need to go pee. Then I get to wondering if I should pee before I start my email, or power through it. Today I chose to power through it. Also my spelling isn't the best, but I'm not apologizing, because i'm not necessarily sorry about it. It'll come back to me someday. So far I think i'm okay. So Mom--don't fix any of the spelling mistakes that may occur, makes it authentic ;)

Soooo I made up a couple of the email addresses I sent this too. Hope it gets to the people I want it to get ot hahahaha if not. Well, it is what it is.

THIS WEEK!

Again- my email is going to be jumbled beyond belief, so think of it as you (the reader, whoever you might be) walki----nevermind. I don't know where I was going with that.

I'll just start!

Best story ever- There is a three haired lady, she wakes up and looks in the mirror and says 'hmm...I think i'll braid my hair today'. The next day it's two, and she says "I think I may just part it down the middle!", day three- "ponytail, all the way!", day four---no more hair. Her response- "I don't have to do my hair today!". Anyways. I was better when the old lady at the devotional taught it. I think I feel in love with her. In a nonromantic way. Her name is Mary Edmunds. She's reeaaaaal spunky. There's tons of people I know that would love her. Namely--Mom! haha. Anyways. Moral of the story-be positive. Also- something i've realized more and more, is that Heavenly Father knows you--He gives you the people you need, when you need them, etc. The situations, the trails, the funniness, etc. He knows you. So don't complain! Everything happens for a reason, so you just gotta learn why you were given a specific situation, and then learn alllll you can from it. Just a thought. But it's a happy thought! A short way to remember that is 'don't worry about it'. That's what I say to myself all the time. Everyday.....in between every japanese sentence spoken. Don't worry about it...someday i'll actually know how to say that in japanese. That might be tonight's goal.

Sunday's and Tuesdays are the very very best days at the mtc. They are devotional days, and choir days! They're the BEST! In a while (I have no way to measure time anymore,...) but in a while we're going to marriot center to sing for the new mission presidents coming in. Should be AMAZING! and then in a nother length of 'while' we're singing somewhere else or doing something else. Should be great! Oh, speaking of music---everyone should read the beginning of the Hymn Book- the first presidency preface. Never read it before this week, and it's wonderful. Supa-da-she (I don't know how to spell it in hapanese, but that's the japanese word for wonderufl!...I use it in almost every sentence I speak).

So. I have already told some of you. But I need to tell the world. I've met the Incredible-----not hulk. But BATMAN! My companion and I were just minding out own business, trying to study japanese in every moment possible, right? So we walk down this long hallway, and open a door. There are two elders there at two of the computer, they don't look at us, be don't look at them. Coles shimai and I were just talking...throwing a few japanese words in cause we're supadashe like that, and one of the elders is like "....Tokyo". us-"excuse me?" him "you're going to tokyo. I can just tell". First of all, he hasn't even looked at us. Anyways, he goes on about how we're obviously new because we're happy, and then continued to give all of his ingenious reasons why and how he knows we're going to tokyo. Anyways, then it happened. The other spoke. HE SPOKE! I thought he was JOKING! This ity bity red-head, opens his mouth, and out comes the power of batman. I couldn't contain myself. I was silently crying to the computer. Then he continued to talk to his presumptuous companion. I couldn't stop. Coles shimai finally saw me crying my eyes out, and we had to leave. Needless to say, that was one of the best moment of my life. Speaking of being starstruck----

uuuuuuuuuuuu anybody watch the missionary video's called 'The District 2'? umm...ummm... Elder Christensen. The blond one. He's here. HE'S TEACHING here. Well, he's doing something here. One of the first nights here he was in charge of my little group. I saw him. I knew who he was, I was starstuck. I also saw him from across the cafeteria, eating. I met him. I shook his hand. He's like one of the biggest stars in the world. Well... I supposed I shouldn't say in the world. I guess in my little missionary world. Nobody thinks it's that cool, they're all playing it off like 'whatever'. But I'm not quite cool enough to do that. I would call these moments when I see him, a kimber or emma moment. I react probably exactly the way they would.

The japanese people are the coolest. guess what song they have in their church hymnbook? It's called "oh, I had such a pretty dream mama". And NO I didn't translate it wrong. It has the english right under the hiragana characters. Anyways, somebody learn how to sing that song, record it, and then send it to me so I can listen to it every day of my life. Please. Speaking of music, this past week they started something new! Exercise classes for sisters only! yoga, pilates, kickboxing, all the super cools stuff right. Oh wait...did I mention ZUMBA! It's rumored that they do zumba once a week to (and I quote) "Upbeat hymns". Yes, upbeat hymns. I'm not much of a get-up-at-6-and-go-kick-a-box kinda person, but that? that will get me out of bed. I just need to research when that is.

Another supadashe moment---this girl in my district (williams shimai) has scriptures. that's great right? we should al have scriptures. But this week I found out more about said scriptures. She got them from like the messed up part of the Deseret Book Store right? the little shelf island where they put all the misfit toys (scriptures). anyways, her scriptures are engraven with "Benjawin Swamuel Swith". I don't know if I laughed at anything harder all week. Besides batman. they probably tied.

So i've been sick, and the only weird thing that's happened to me is my dreams. they are so weird!!! And I wake up all disoriented. the other night I woke up, thought I was at home, and then I was like "hmmm maybe i'm dreaming about being in the mtc"....noooo no see I was actually IN the mtc. Anyways, funny nights. Nights where I feel like I've aged 60 years, and when I wake up I'll be an old lady. I can't describe it, but I think Heavenly Father is entertaining me so that I can have a productive, entertaining day.

Sooo have a ever mentioned we have DINNER at 4:10? it's wonderful. but I'm also desperately hungry when I get back to my room at 9:30 because well, I like to eat! So yesterday, I singlehandedly ate an entire kingsized symphony bar without realizing it, in about 7 minutes. I was pretty proud.

OH! I SAW McKenna and Nathan at the temple today!!! It made me SO HAPPY! And they brought be SEES CHOCOLATE!!! Best day EVER!!!!! (I just gotta hide it from everyone else, because these...these I'm not sharing...) hope that's not to selfish. But I think about it and I'm like "hhmmm maybe I should share." and then I look up at the sky and I get the impression "no...no heather you don't have to share". I share all other chocolate. Just not this.

Soooo Watanabe San and Hitome are our investigators right now. (yes bennett, I found myself some more imaginary friends). Watanabe san asked us if his earthly father was God. There are some language barriers you see, and I don't know exactly if he ever found out the answer. I drew him nice pictures though. So maybe? It's like this sister in my district says-- "if you recognize a word, just testify about it". So there you go. I know how to pray, and I know how to testify. So testify I do. Do I know what I testify of? not all the time....but the lessons are actually really really really good. They're my favorite.

Another reason why the japanese are hilarious--- i'll shortly explain this. ummm their english words they adapt? I'll share an example. Daily Planner in Japanese is 'deiri purana'. One of my favorite things to say. I thank heavenly father for my deiri purana in almost every prayer.

Isaiah 55:12---my gift for the day of entertainment. Read it, and then draw a picture. I'm going to hang my picture up next to my desk. It's inspiring really. All I can think about when I read is it Elf--the scene where he's traveling to New York and all the woodland characters are like 'hey buddy!' and then mix that with the scene in one of the spidermans where he's walking and smiling to the song 'raindrops keep falling on my head'. Anyways. thats my last thought because my time is up! I NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO SEND PICTZUERS!!!!!

I LOVE EVERYONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!!

Sincerely,

Lane Shimai... :)

mmmmm so i've been trying to send pictures, but it's not working...and it's using up my time...so i'll try again after if I have time :)

Most exciting news from this week?!?!?!?

WE HAVE A BAPTISM!!!!!!! I haven't told any of your about Kubo san probably....well, basically he's this really great guy that knows that Christ is a nice person, and so he wanted to meet with the missionaries to see if he could become a better person like Christ. (He's just a pretend investigator, but he's really intense and convincing). Kubo san is a real person he's playing, so in that way it was very real to us! But yeah, he's committed to baptism and he's so excited. We made him sing with us :) It was fantastic. I was trying SO HARD not to laugh while he was singing, not because he was bad, but because it was hilarious hearing someone with a legit Japanese accent sing in Japanese and pretend not to know the tune hahaha. It was great. Singing is the best at bringing the spirit :) Everyone who is going to the MTC----highly recommend joining choir! It's super fun, and you get a definite seat for the devotionals on tuesday....

So throughout the week i've been writing down little things to help me remember what to say in my email. So this email is going to be going up down, right and left with no notice. That doesn't make sense. But i'm moving on anyways. hahaha alright. 

First off, i'm leaving for Japan on July 15th! We'll get to call family at the airport? I don't know what time or anything though so I don't know if i'll end up calling. 

More on Kubo San---I don't remember if I said anything about him last week, but here we go! We teach him in ONLY japanese. NO english....sooooo it's been one of the craziest weeks. We taught him everyday, and felt like 5 year olds the whole time. Laughing and laughing. So, when I get nervous, I smile and laugh. Which is convienient because it makes me happy. You can't not be happy when you're smiling. 

Anyways. 

KATE WOOLLEY is coming to the MTC this wednesday if i'm not mistaken. They just started sending some people over to raintree to live, so I'm crossing my fingers that you will be HERE and not there. Then we'll actually see each other!! I'm so excited for you to come. Advice---bring a robe. SO much easier than carrying around a bunch of stuff from the bathroom to your room. I got mine from walmart. It's like an extra-large, with little butterflies and flowers on the neckline. Priceless. It's been really funny, because no one really understands my humor here, so wearing that nightgown and my bright yellow flamingo nightgown just make people look at me....and assume I clearly don't know what I look like. It's like an inside joke hahaha I've been laughing at myself a lot lately hahaha. But yes. Walmart, jackpot for awesome, joy-bringing sleep attire. 

So on wednesday I felt SO LOVED. I got a box of donuts from the Pappenfusses (I'm really really sorry I don't know how to spell it) and a box of cinnamon rolls from Mom! I felt on top of the world. Those made a lot of missionaries really really happy!!! 

Thank you for everyone who sends me letters. It's by far the best part of the day. (in most ways). I look forward to it a ton I guess I should say. So THANK YOU! I love letters. Letters from strangers (haven't gotten any of those...) letters from anyone random, letters from anyone! I love letters. Also, dear Elder is the best! It's free while I'm in the mtc, and they're delivered everyday! Sooooooo dearelder is the best....

Thomas---Sooo remember how you said you had two friends going to Fukuoka? Finally figured out who they are! Bryan is actually in my district! Then Braswell Choro is in another district. cool cool cool.

Oh---get this. My branch president is President Butler, and his councilors are Brother Wood and Brother Willes. hahaha funny. Cause none of them are the butler, wood, or willes that I know...

Oh! Anybody looking for heaps of fun? Memorize the Hiragana characters for Japanese, and then you'll be able to sing the hymns in Japanese!!! It won't take that long, and you'll feel super duper cool!...like everone does who speaks Japanese...

ERYN AND WILLIAM ARE HAVING A BOY!!! I FORGOT TO MAKE THAT THE FIRST THING!!! Rachel and I ran into each other on the way to check the house to see the balloon, and THERE IS WAS!!!! The whole time walking over I was like 'i hope its a boy i hope its a boy I hope its a boy" and rachel was all "I hope it's a girl i hope its a girl I hope its a girl"... ITS A BOY! I couldn't be more excited!! Congratulations times a billion :) I'll get to meet him when he's 1, but hopefully somehow at Christmas or something we'll be able to skype and I can see him! I can hardly wait. He looks sooo handsome :)

I've been wishing that I brought my book The Continuous Atonement. So if anyone hasn't read it, do it. It's like my favorite book in the whole entire world. Besides the Book of Mormon and all the standard works of course. It's just the best. Everyone should read it.

Here's how my shedule looks usually.

Wake up at 6:15, get ready.

Breakfast at 6:45

Personal study 7:15-8:10

Classroom instruction (ALL IN JAPANESE) 8:10-11:10

Lunch 11:10

Preach my gospel study time 11:55-1:30

TALL (language study on computers)- 1:30-2:30

Gym time (we ride bikes)- 2:40-3:30

Dinner- 4:10

Classroom instruction-4:55-7:55

language study 8-9

daily planning session 9-9:30

Get ready for bed

'quiet time' 10:15

Lights out by 10:30

Anyways, its different everyday, but the only thing that's different usually is the order of things.

Next week we start teaching 2 new investigators! So that's great!! :)

SO! I had a nightmare this week that there was this gang of these gross, juicy spiders, and then this other gang of Big, thick, hairy spiders came and sucked the life out of them. So we didn't want to kill the big ones until the juicy ones were dead, but then once the hari ones were done, they ran away and we couldn't find them. It was AWFUL!. 

Also, I woke up the other morning and thought I was at home, and then I heard a "UHHHHH"...then a response with "yooooaa'....followed by a "shimai". All my roommates talk to each other in their sleep hahahaha. Not quite in Japanese just yet though haha I'll let you know when that happens.

Funny story, so I was trying to translate what the teacher was telling us about out investigator, and I thought she said "he met the missionaries at narcotics anonymous"...apparently that wasn't correct. I also frequently mix up "Shu" and "Shi". One means 'Lord', the other means 'death'. SO "i love death, death loves us, death wants me to follow Him, when we rely on death we are happy" ...hai (yes)...that's what I've been saying all week!! Hahahaha...yeah. My sensei-- "Whhhat???"... yes.

So 'hai' (yes) sounds like 'hi' obviously...so many a times people that are NOT japanese speaking (I don't know why I always assume they are) ask me questions and I just say 'hi'. I think that every single person who doesn't speak, thinks I have hearing issues or otherwise hahaha.

So it happened. I had a break down. I think it was on Thursday, my companion and i were just starting our planning session, and I was saying it "...doryo kansha shite imasu...MTC-" and immeadiately we both started laughing. We had had it haha. She had been crying earlier because she was so frustrated, but I hadn't broken down yet haha. But you see, in Nihongo (japanese) MTC is pronounced "MTShe". If you said that outloud, it's hilarious. Anyways, we laughed, except I couldn't stop. I literally could not bring myself to stop laughing. It was one of the most frustratingly glorious moments of my life hahaha.

Okay, I've written like a ton and I know there will be things I will have wished I had written down, but times up! I love you all!! WRITE TO ME! Tell me what's going on! My mtc classroom doesn't even have windows so the days literally melt together. Time has ceased to be. SO WRITE TO ME!!!!

Also---look up the NY Times thingy called 'one in a million'. It's a bunch of little videos of really great people. We haven't watched all of them, but we watch them and then 'practice' teaching them. The live in babysitter is my favorite one by far that i've seen. I also like Patrick. Watch them! Enjoy them!!

DAH I have to tell this story. I thought it was hilarious. But it'lll be more hilarious if you watch the Patrick video first. So go watch that, and then come back and read this story:

(we were role playing, I was Patrick, this elder was the missionary)--Side note: this missionary is completely sincere and serious

Elder: Patrick, I know you love the ocean, it's beauty, and everything about it. You love enjoying the salty air, the sweet sunrises, and the beautiful setting. I too love the ocean, and though I've never gone sailing or surfing, I feel that it would be a magnificant experience. So tell me how you would feel, if suddenly the waves lost their movement. The water became dirty, the sweet smell you once enjoyed was turned to stench. All of the beauty was gone. How would you feel?

Me: I would be absolutely devestated (I sincerely felt darkness as he was saying this haha sucking all the happiness out of pretend patrick)

Elder: So it is with sin.

hhahahahahahaha it was so funny. We went on and he taught a great lesson, but during feedback I did tell him that that was a little strong haha so we laughed about it and he was like 'yeah I thought it might be...' anyways, I don't know if that is anywhere near as funny as it was in that moment, or as funny as is still is in my mind, but I hope somehow you enjoyed it hahaha.

Oh! So my new favorite thing about Preach My Gospel is the Christlike attributes in the back. Everyone should read them and focus on one at a time. they're phenominal!

Tomorrow is sunday. And we're doing an english fast every sunday from now one....Soooo only jpanaese it is. Even with your companion. Goodness gracious hahaha. I'll definitely have stories from that! But I know how to pray, I know how to say 'toilet' and I know how to smile. So I think i'm pretty much covered.

Okay for real now, I love you all!!! Hope you're having a fantastic week!!!!!

Sincerely and with so much love,

Lane Shimai

AHH

MY TIME IS LITERALLY COUNTING DOWN!

Hey mama~

Dropping Heather off at the MTC

So. My name, as I found out a couple days ago, is now Lane Shimai. (sounds a little like Dane She my). 

Japanese...is hilarious. The language itself. Not the class. My teacher speaks only in Japanese, and yesterday, for the first time, she spoke in English, and I had that exact moment that was in The Best Two Years. The one where the nerdy guy is all like 'what language is he speaking?'....'english'. Anyways. I was like woah woah woah!! Hold on there!! That is NOT Japanese! But alas, it was my mother language. Please pray that I will come home speaking english normally. At this point I don't know what my little brain is going to do. I think it's starting to erase english...and it hasn't been that long!

Alright, what else to tell...ummm the MTC is really hard. But great. And also a lot easier than I expected in some ways. It's amazingly difficult to get used to accepting the rules as i've found out. I'm all for rules that make sense to me, buuuut the mtc has a lot of rules that are not explained, and will never be explained. Don't worry, I'm following those too! It's just really weird.

The food- Not that bad. But also not that good. Yesterday we had freshetta pizza (Nathan Tanner---they let us each have THREE pieces instead of 1!) anyways, they also have a kind of cake everyday, usually pretty good. There is this one cake they consistently have, I don't know if anyone will get the joke, but it makes perfect sense that they would have it in the mtc hahaha

I run into people I know all the time. OH--side note----THANK YOU KATE WOOLLEY!!! The first day of mail I got a letter from you, it meant the world to me!!! Dear Elder is the best. No waiting time. anyways. Yes, so i've seen Hermana Bumstead a few times now! I think we have meals at the same time. And Elder Conley! Let's see...who else? Elder Edwards...Rhett? I don't know if anyone reading this email knows him, but he's a kid from efy. McCall (Mishler) would know who i'm talking about but she's in Israel right now haha so nevermind.

Uhh...so my p-days are on saturday, and we go to the temple at about 12:55...so anyone whose interest in meeting me there...(just kidding!) kinda. hahaha oh man I'm so funny. Oh, also, I haven't quite found anyone who gets my jokes. Someday. Someday...

My doryo is Coles Shimai. She was born and raised in Texas, doesn't really have an accent, but she has all those words southerners like to say haha. Her hobbies you ask? Shooting.  Weird going everywhere with someone...and I haven't gotten used to it yet, but yeah. It's weird. Sometimes I feel like everything I want to do is now selfish. "Shimai...I'll be right back i'm going to the bathroom" wait...I mean come follow me I have to go to the bathroom...I don't know how to explain it. But yeah haha weird weird weird weird weird.

So, the first night we got back...I went to go unpack my stuff...and GUESS WHAT I REMEMBERED!!! I have CHOCOLATE! Thank you Thomas Milligan. You're the best. Never have I ever loved chocolate so much as i do now. That was a side note...sorry

What else would anyone be interested in hearing? Oh, contrary to prior dreams i've had, everyone DOES smile here in the mtc. They're all really nice. And helpful! um. 

Oh, something I didn't bring that i wish I would have---a blanket or something from home. And a laundry bag, and a water bottle. BUT they are also unnecessary.

I share a room with my doryo, and two other shimai...one from Canada haha that's fun. They're all very sweet!

It says I have one minute. I don't belive it. 

Oh, fun fact! 'fun' in japanese means minutes.. Sooo I have 1 fun! ichi fun? fun ichi? I don't know I haven't quite figured it all out. Someday.

OH! Biggest blessing... So the season in Provo seems to have magically changed from summer to fall, and it's GREAT! I love it. I don't know how long it's going to last, but all I can say is dandelion wishes DO come true!

Send me letters. Because I love them! The mail is delivered everyday, but we're only allowed to write on p-days. BUT I can print out my emails at this secret little computer lab, so it's all alright! I print the emails so reading them doesn't take up any of my time. Anyways, let's see.

Well, I guess that's all for this week. Any questions about the mtc? it's a little different from what I was expecting. 

Oh! And I went over to the fense the other day and looked at the house-- no one was outside. Which was a shame haha. But on the 22nd I'll definitely be looking for that balloon!!!!!!! I hope everyone has a great week!!

Smile! Be happy! I love you all! Oh, also, if you're ever feeling down about school or whatever, just visualize me. In the mtc. With a teacher who only speaks in japanese. (that's for you Kimber, I thought it would be a nice picture for you). 

Another funny thought for you (or whoever), starting this Sunday, the Branch President randomly calls on like 5 different people from the audience to give a talk. In Japanese. About a certain topic. SO we prepare a talk each week. The problem isn't so much writing it as it is reading it. I get nervous when I speak in ENGLISH in front of people. But Japanese? In front of people who know Japanese? Now that's a funny thought.

People here always say that if you make it till Sunday in the MTC, you're all set. I'm not sure exactly what that means, but hey. It's Saturday...and it's p-day. so I'm okay haha. Church tomorrow will be fun.

FUN FACT---guess who is one of my zone leaders? YES that's correct! Baird Churro. (elders are called 'churros'. I think the Japanese got mixed up in some kind of Mexican culinary service). But yes, that is correct. Sterling Baird, is my zone leader. Small. World.

I guess I have to go for real. (technically we have an hour to email, but most of them are still set to the old 30 minutes). So i've been goin for 45, but my companion is waiting right next to me and checking her watch every minute. haha gotta love her!

Goodbye everybody! Have a great week! SMILE!

Sincerely,

Lane Shimai... ;)

The Sweetest Love Story, Ever Told: {Elder Richard G. Scott}

"On July 16, 1953, my beloved Jeanene and I knelt as a young couple at an altar in the Manti Utah Temple. President Lewis R. Anderson exercised the sealing authority and pronounced us husband and wife, wedded for time and for all eternity. I have no power to describe the peace and serenity that come from the assurance that as I continue to live worthily, I will be able to be with my beloved Jeanene and our children forever because of that sacred ordinance performed with the proper priesthood authority in the house of the Lord.

Our seven children are bound to us by the sacred ordinances of the temple. My precious wife, Jeanene, and two of our children are beyond the veil. They provide a powerful motivation for each remaining member of our family to live so that together we will receive all of the eternal blessings promised in the temple.

Two of the vital pillars that sustain Father in Heaven’s plan of happiness are marriage and the family. Their lofty significance is underscored by Satan’s relentless efforts to splinter the family and to undermine the significance of temple ordinances, which bind the family together for eternity. The temple sealing has greater meaning as life unfolds. It will help you draw ever closer together and find greater joy and fulfillment in mortality.

Once I learned an important lesson from my wife. I traveled extensively in my profession. I had been gone almost two weeks and returned home one Saturday morning. I had four hours before I needed to attend another meeting. I noticed that our little washing machine had broken down and my wife was washing the clothes by hand. I began to fix the machine.

Jeanene came by and said, “Rich, what are you doing?”

I said, “I’m repairing the washing machine so you don’t have to do this by hand.”

She said, “No. Go play with the children.”

I said, “I can play with the children anytime. I want to help you.”

Then she said, “Richard, please go play with the children.”

When she spoke to me that authoritatively, I obeyed.

I had a marvelous time with our children. We chased each other around and rolled in the fall leaves. Later I went to my meeting. I probably would have forgotten that experience were it not for the lesson that she wanted me to learn.

The next morning about 4:00 a.m., I was awakened as I felt two little arms around my neck, a kiss on the cheek, and these words whispered in my ear, which I will never forget: “Dad, I love you. You are my best friend.”

If you are having that kind of experience in your family, you are having one of the supernal joys of life.

If you are a young man of appropriate age and are not married, don’t waste time in idle pursuits. Get on with life and focus on getting married. Don’t just coast through this period of life. Young men, serve a worthy mission. Then make your highest priority finding a worthy, eternal companion. When you find you are developing an interest in a young woman, show her that you are an exceptional person that she would find interesting to know better. Take her to places that are worthwhile. Show some ingenuity. If you want to have a wonderful wife, you need to have her see you as a wonderful man and prospective husband.

If you have found someone, you can form an extraordinarily wonderful courtship and marriage and be very, very happy eternally by staying within the bounds of worthiness the Lord has established.

If you are married, are you faithful to your spouse mentally as well as physically? Are you loyal to your marriage covenants by never engaging in conversation with another person that you wouldn’t want your spouse to overhear? Are you kind and supportive of your spouse and children?

Brethren, do you lead out in family activities such as scripture study, family prayer, and family home evening, or does your wife fill in the gap your lack of attention leaves in the home? Do you tell your wife often how very much you love her? It will bring her great happiness. I’ve heard men tell me when I say that, “Oh, she knows.” You need to tell her. A woman grows and is greatly blessed by that reassurance. Express gratitude for what your spouse does for you. Express that love and gratitude often. That will make life far richer and more pleasant and purposeful. Don’t withhold those natural expressions of love. And it works a lot better if you are holding her close while you tell her.

I learned from my wife the importance of expressions of love. Early in our marriage, often I would open my scriptures to give a message in a meeting, and I would find an affectionate, supportive note Jeanene had slipped into the pages. Sometimes they were so tender that I could hardly talk. Those precious notes from a loving wife were and continue to be a priceless treasure of comfort and inspiration.

I began to do the same thing with her, not realizing how much it truly meant to her. I remember one year we didn’t have the resources for me to give her a valentine, so I decided to paint a watercolor on the front of the refrigerator. I did the best I could; only I made one mistake. It was enamel paint, not watercolor. She never let me try to remove that permanent paint from the refrigerator.

I remember one day I took some of those little round paper circles that form when you punch holes in paper, and I wrote on them the numbers 1 to 100. I turned each over and wrote her a message, one word on each circle. Then I scooped them up and put them in an envelope. I thought she would get a good laugh.

When she passed away, I found in her private things how much she appreciated the simple messages that we shared with each other. I noted that she had carefully pasted every one of those circles on a piece of paper. She not only kept my notes to her, but she protected them with plastic coverings as if they were a valuable treasure. There is only one that she didn’t put with the others. It is still behind the glass in our kitchen clock. It reads, “Jeanene, it is time to tell you I love you.” It remains there and reminds me of that exceptional daughter of Father in Heaven.

As I have thought back over our life together, I realize how blessed we’ve been. We have not had arguments in our home or unkind words between us. Now I realize that blessing came because of her. It resulted from her willingness to give, to share, and to never think of herself. In our later life together, I tried to emulate her example. I suggest that as husband and wife you do the same in your home.

Pure love is an incomparable, potent power for good. Righteous love is the foundation of a successful marriage. It is the primary cause of contented, well-developed children. Who can justly measure the righteous influence of a mother’s love? What enduring fruits result from the seeds of truth that a mother carefully plants and lovingly cultivates in the fertile soil of a child’s trusting mind and heart? As a mother you have been given divine instincts to help you sense your child’s special talents and unique capacities. With your husband you can nurture, strengthen, and cause those traits to flower.

It is so rewarding to be married. Marriage is wonderful. In time you begin to think alike and have the same ideas and impressions. You have times when you are extremely happy, times of testing, and times of trial, but the Lord guides you through all of those growth experiences together.

One night our little son Richard, who had a heart problem, awoke crying. The two of us heard it. Normally my wife always got up to take care of a crying baby, but this time I said, “I’ll take care of him.”

Because of his problem, when he began to cry, his little heart would pound very rapidly. He would throw up and soil the bed clothing. That night I held him very close to try to calm his racing heart and stop his crying as I changed his clothes and put on new bedsheets. I held him until he went to sleep. I didn’t know then that just a few months later he would pass away. I will always remember holding him in my arms in the middle of that night.

I remember well the day he passed away. As Jeanene and I drove from the hospital, we pulled over to the side of the road. I held her in my arms. Each of us cried some, but we realized that we would have him beyond the veil because of the covenants we had made in the temple. That made his loss somewhat easier to accept.

Jeanene’s kindness taught me so many valuable things. I was so immature, and she was so disciplined and so spiritual. Marriage provides an ideal setting for overcoming any tendency to be selfish or self-centered. I think one of the reasons that we are counseled to get married early in life is to avoid developing inappropriate character traits that are hard to change.

I feel sorry for any man who hasn’t yet made the choice to seek an eternal companion, and my heart weeps for the sisters who haven’t had the opportunity to marry. Some of you may feel lonely and unappreciated and cannot see how it will be possible for you to have the blessings of marriage and children or your own family. All things are possible to the Lord, and He keeps the promises He inspires His prophets to declare. Eternity is a long time. Have faith in those promises and live to be worthy of them so that in His time the Lord can make them come true in your life. With certainty, you will receive every promised blessing for which you are worthy.

Please pardon me for speaking of my precious wife, Jeanene, but we are an eternal family. She was always joyously happy, and much of it came from service to others. Even while very ill, in her morning prayer she would ask her Father in Heaven to lead her to someone she could help. That sincere supplication was answered time and again. The burdens of many were eased; their lives were brightened. She was blessed continually for being an instrument directed by the Lord.

I know what it is to love a daughter of Father in Heaven who with grace and devotion lived the full feminine splendor of her righteous womanhood. I am confident that when, in our future, I see her again beyond the veil, we will recognize that we have become even more deeply in love. We will appreciate each other even more, having spent this time separated by the veil. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen."

-Elder Richard G. Scott, April 2011 General Conference

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/04/the-eternal-blessings-of-marriage?lang=eng